Embracing Healing: Seeking Help When Struggling with Self-Harm

In the depths of emotional pain and turmoil, the urge to self-harm can feel overwhelming and consuming. For many individuals, self-harm serves as a coping mechanism – a way to numb unbearable emotions, regain a sense of control, or express inner turmoil when words fail. However, beneath the surface of self-harm lies profound suffering and a longing for relief.

At Connected Families Counseling, we believe that seeking help is not a sign of weakness, but a courageous step towards reclaiming control of your life and embracing a brighter, more fulfilling future.

First and foremost, it's important to recognize that self-harm is not a character flaw or a moral failing; it's a symptom of deeper emotional distress that deserves compassion, understanding, and professional support. Whether you're struggling with cutting, burning, scratching, or any other form of self-injury, know that you are not alone, and help is available.

So, why is it so crucial to seek help when struggling with self-harm? Here are a few reasons to consider:

1. Break the cycle of shame and isolation: Keeping self-harm a secret can perpetuate feelings of shame, guilt, and isolation, further exacerbating your emotional pain. Opening up to a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional can help break the cycle of secrecy and create a safe space for healing and support.

2. Address underlying emotional pain: Self-harm is often a symptom of deeper emotional wounds, such as trauma, depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem. By seeking help, you can begin to explore the underlying causes of your self-harming behaviors and develop healthier coping strategies to manage your emotions and find relief.

3. Learn alternative coping skills: While self-harm may provide temporary relief from emotional distress, it is ultimately a harmful and unsustainable coping mechanism. Through therapy, you can learn alternative coping skills and self-soothing techniques to manage overwhelming emotions in healthier ways, such as mindfulness, deep breathing exercises, or creative expression.

4. Receive compassionate support: Healing from self-harm is a journey that requires patience, courage, and support from others. Therapists and counselors can provide compassionate guidance, validation, and evidence-based interventions to help you navigate the challenges of recovery and build a brighter, more resilient future.

5. Prevent future harm: Seeking help for self-harm is not just about addressing current symptoms; it's about preventing future harm and creating a life worth living. With the right support and resources, you can develop the skills and resilience to cope with life's challenges without resorting to self-injury.

At Connected Families Counseling, we are dedicated to providing a safe, non-judgmental space for individuals struggling with self-harm to explore their emotions, heal from past wounds, and cultivate healthier ways of coping. Our team of compassionate therapists is here to support you every step of the way, offering personalized guidance and evidence-based interventions tailored to your unique needs and goals.

If you're struggling with self-harm, know that there is hope for healing and a brighter future ahead. You deserve to live a life free from the grip of self-destructive behaviors, and seeking help is the first courageous step towards reclaiming control of your life and embracing a future filled with hope, resilience, and possibility.

How to Stop Negative Thought Patterns

Negative thought patterns can be like heavy chains, weighing us down and preventing us from living our lives to the fullest. Whether it's self-doubt, pessimism, or constant worry, these patterns can have a significant impact on our mental well-being. The good news is that with awareness and intentional effort, it's possible to break free from these chains and cultivate a more positive mindset. In this blog post, we'll explore practical strategies to stop negative thought patterns and promote a healthier mental outlook.

Cultivate Self-Awareness:

The first step towards breaking free from negative thought patterns is to become aware of them. Pay attention to your thoughts without judgment. Notice when your mind starts spiraling into negativity. Journaling can be a helpful tool in this process. Write down your thoughts and emotions, and identify recurring patterns. By understanding the root of these thoughts, you can begin to challenge and change them.

Challenge Negative Thoughts:

Once you've identified negative thought patterns, challenge them. Ask yourself if these thoughts are based on facts or assumptions. Are you catastrophizing, assuming the worst will happen? Try to find evidence to support or contradict these thoughts. Often, negative thoughts lose their power when subjected to logical scrutiny.

Practice Mindfulness:

Mindfulness involves being fully present in the moment without judgment. Techniques like meditation and deep breathing can help you become more aware of your thoughts and break the cycle of negativity. Set aside time each day for mindfulness practice to build resilience against negative thought patterns.

Focus on Positive Affirmations:

Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements that reinforce a desired mindset. For example, if you catch yourself thinking, "I'll never succeed," counteract it with, "I am capable, and I will overcome challenges." Repeat these affirmations regularly to rewire your brain and create a more positive internal dialogue.

Surround Yourself with Positivity:

Your environment plays a significant role in shaping your thoughts. Surround yourself with positive influences, whether it's uplifting people, motivational literature, or inspiring quotes. Limit exposure to negative media or situations that trigger pessimistic thoughts. Create a space that fosters positivity and encourages a more optimistic mindset.

Set Realistic Goals:

Unattainable goals can lead to frustration and self-doubt. Break down larger goals into smaller, more manageable tasks. Celebrate small victories, and focus on progress rather than perfection. Realistic goals set the stage for positive reinforcement and help combat the negative belief that success is unattainable.

Seek Professional Support:

If negative thought patterns persist and significantly impact your daily life, seeking the help of a mental health professional can be beneficial. Therapists and counselors are trained to guide individuals through the process of identifying and challenging negative thought patterns, providing tools to foster a more positive mindset.

Breaking free from negative thought patterns is a journey that requires patience, self-compassion, and consistent effort. By cultivating self-awareness, challenging negative thoughts, practicing mindfulness, embracing positive affirmations, curating a positive environment, setting realistic goals, and seeking professional support when needed, you can gradually shift your mindset towards a more positive and fulfilling life. Remember, change takes time, so be kind to yourself throughout this transformative process.

Breaking the Silence: When to Seek Help for Mental Health

Mental health is an integral part of our overall well-being, and it deserves the same attention and care as physical health. Yet, seeking help for mental health concerns can be daunting, often accompanied by feelings of shame or uncertainty. In this blog post, we aim to break the silence surrounding when to seek help for mental health and provide guidance on recognizing the signs that it's time to reach out to a mental health professional

Persistent and Overwhelming Emotions

One of the key indicators that it may be time to seek help for mental health is when your emotions become persistent and overwhelming. If you find that you're experiencing extreme sadness, anxiety, anger, or other intense emotions for an extended period and these feelings are affecting your daily life, it's crucial to seek assistance.

Significant Changes in Behavior

Sudden and significant changes in behavior can be a sign that something is amiss. These changes might include withdrawal from social activities, neglect of personal hygiene, substance abuse, self-harm, or engaging in risky behaviors. When these changes become noticeable to you or those around you, it's time to consider seeking professional help.
Relationship Struggles

Strained relationships with friends and family can be a clear indicator of underlying mental health issues. If you find it challenging to connect with others, communicate effectively, or maintain healthy relationships, it's an important sign to reach out for support.

Physical Symptoms

Mental health issues can often manifest as physical symptoms. Frequent headaches, digestive problems, insomnia, and unexplained aches and pains can all be connected to emotional distress. If you experience these symptoms regularly, consider discussing them with a healthcare professional.

Decreased Functionality

A significant decrease in your ability to function at work, school, or in daily life can signal a need for help. If you're struggling to concentrate, perform tasks, or find motivation to complete your daily responsibilities, it's time to reach out for support.

Thoughts of Self-Harm or Suicide

Thoughts of self-harm or suicide should always be taken seriously. If you or someone you know is experiencing these thoughts, seek immediate help from a mental health crisis line, a counselor, or a healthcare provider. Remember, you don't have to go through this alone, and there are people and resources available to help.

Unresolved Grief or Trauma

Grief and trauma can be incredibly challenging to navigate, and sometimes they linger far longer than expected. If you're finding it difficult to move past a traumatic event or the loss of a loved one, consider speaking with a mental health professional who can provide guidance and support.

It's important to remember that seeking help for mental health is a sign of strength, not weakness. Mental health issues are common, and many people face them at some point in their lives. Recognizing the signs, reaching out to a mental health professional, and opening up to friends and family are crucial steps in the journey toward better mental health. Don't suffer in silence – there is help available, and you deserve the support and care necessary to live a healthy and fulfilling life.

Therapy for New Moms

Becoming a mother is one of the most transformative experiences a woman can go through. From the moment you hold your precious baby in your arms, your life changes in ways you could never have imagined. While motherhood is undoubtedly a beautiful and rewarding journey, it can also be incredibly challenging and overwhelming, especially for new moms. The physical and emotional demands of caring for a newborn, coupled with sleepless nights and fluctuating hormones, can take a toll on a woman's mental health. This is why therapy for new moms is a valuable and often necessary resource.

Understanding the Challenges

The arrival of a new baby brings forth a range of emotions. New moms can experience a mix of joy, anxiety, exhaustion, and self-doubt. While these feelings are a normal part of motherhood, some women may find it difficult to manage them on their own. The challenges that new moms face include:

1. Postpartum Depression (PPD): PPD is a real and often underestimated condition. It can affect new mothers, causing symptoms such as sadness, extreme fatigue, mood swings, and a sense of hopelessness. Therapy can be a crucial tool for addressing and overcoming PPD.

2. Adjustment Issues: The transition into motherhood can be challenging, as it involves adapting to a new role and identity. Many new moms struggle with feelings of uncertainty and the loss of their pre-parenthood lives. Therapy can help them navigate these changes and build resilience.

3. Relationship Stress: The arrival of a new baby can put stress on a relationship, as the focus shifts to the needs of the child. Relationship therapy can help couples communicate effectively and find new ways to connect and support each other during this critical time.

4. Self-Care: New moms often put their own needs last, prioritizing the well-being of their baby above all else. This self-sacrifice can lead to burnout and mental health issues. Therapy can provide new moms with the tools to practice self-care and maintain their mental and emotional well-being.

The Benefits of Therapy for New Moms

1. Safe Space for Expression: Therapy offers a non-judgmental and confidential environment for new moms to express their thoughts and feelings. This can be especially important when they may be reluctant to share their fears and anxieties with friends or family.

2. Skills for Coping: Therapists can teach valuable coping strategies to help new moms manage stress and anxiety. These tools can include mindfulness techniques, relaxation exercises, and communication skills.

3. Validation: Many new mothers feel isolated and overwhelmed by their emotions. Therapy can provide a sense of validation, assuring them that what they're experiencing is normal and that they're not alone in their struggles.

4. Support and Guidance: Therapists can guide new moms in setting achievable goals and offer guidance on self-care practices that can promote overall well-being. This support can make a significant difference in a mother's ability to navigate the challenges of motherhood.

Choosing the Right Therapist

Finding the right therapist is essential for a successful therapy journey. Consider the following factors when choosing a therapist for new moms:

1. Experience: Look for a therapist who specializes in maternal mental health, postpartum issues, or family dynamics. They should have experience working with new moms.

2. Accessibility: Consider practical factors like location, schedule, and whether the therapist offers virtual sessions to accommodate the demands of motherhood.

3. Comfort: It's essential to feel comfortable and connected with your therapist. Trust your instincts when selecting a therapist, and don't hesitate to try out a few until you find the right fit.

Therapy can be a lifeline for new moms struggling with the challenges of motherhood. It provides a safe space to explore their feelings, develop coping strategies, and receive the support they need to thrive in their new roles. Remember, seeking therapy is a sign of strength and resilience, not weakness. As a new mom, taking care of your mental health is one of the best gifts you can give yourself and your child.

Navigating Relationships and Stress: Women's Journey to Wellness Through Therapy

In today's world, women often find themselves juggling multiple roles and responsibilities. Whether it's managing careers, raising families, or nurturing relationships, the pressure can be overwhelming. In the quest to maintain a sense of balance and well-being, many women are turning to therapy as a powerful tool to navigate the complexities of relationships and manage stress effectively. In this blog, we will explore the reasons why women seek therapy for relationships and stress, the benefits it offers, and how it can empower women to lead happier, healthier lives.

Understanding the Need

1. Relationship Challenges: Women often face unique challenges in their relationships, be it with partners, family members, or friends. These challenges may include communication issues, conflicts, trust issues, or emotional intimacy concerns. Therapy provides a safe and non-judgmental space for women to address these issues, gain insights, and develop healthier ways of relating to others.

2. Stress Management: The demands of modern life can lead to chronic stress, which can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental health. Women, in particular, may experience stress related to societal expectations, work-family balance, and the various roles they fulfill. Therapy equips women with coping strategies, resilience, and emotional intelligence to better manage stressors.

Benefits of Therapy

1. Improved Communication: Effective communication is the foundation of healthy relationships. Therapy helps women develop better communication skills, enabling them to express their thoughts and feelings more openly and assertively. This fosters deeper connections and reduces misunderstandings.

2. Increased Self-awareness: Therapy encourages self-reflection and self-awareness. Women who seek therapy often gain a better understanding of their own needs, values, and boundaries. This self-awareness is crucial for making informed decisions and setting healthy boundaries in relationships.

3. Stress Reduction: Therapy equips women with tools to manage stress effectively. Techniques such as mindfulness, relaxation exercises, and cognitive-behavioral strategies help women reduce stress levels and improve overall well-being.

4. Empowerment: Therapy empowers women to take control of their lives. It helps them recognize their strengths, overcome challenges, and make choices that align with their values. This empowerment leads to greater self-confidence and a sense of agency in their relationships and lives.

5. Healthy Relationships: By addressing relationship issues in therapy, women can build healthier and more fulfilling connections with others. They learn to set boundaries, resolve conflicts constructively, and foster mutual respect and trust.

Breaking the Stigma

Seeking therapy for relationship and stress-related concerns is a proactive step towards self-care and personal growth. However, there can be societal stigma associated with seeking help, particularly for mental health. It's crucial to break down these barriers and normalize therapy as a valuable resource.

Conclusion

Women who choose therapy for relationships and stress are not admitting weakness; they are demonstrating strength and resilience. It takes courage to confront challenges and seek professional guidance to overcome them. Therapy offers a transformative journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and improved well-being. By embracing therapy, women can forge healthier relationships, reduce stress, and live more fulfilling lives, ultimately becoming powerful advocates for their own happiness and mental health.

How Therapy Can Be a Lifeline During Hard Times

Life is an unpredictable journey filled with ups and downs. At times, we face challenges that seem insurmountable, leaving us feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or even helpless. During these difficult periods, therapy can offer a much-needed lifeline. It provides a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to explore their emotions, gain self-awareness, and develop coping strategies. In this blog post, we will delve into the ways therapy can be a valuable resource in navigating through hard times and emerging stronger on the other side.

1. Validation and Emotional Support: One of the most profound aspects of therapy is the validation and emotional support it offers. In times of distress, it's crucial to have someone who listens attentively, empathizes with our struggles, and helps us feel understood. A therapist can provide that unwavering support, creating a space where individuals can freely express their emotions without fear of judgment. This process alone can alleviate the burden and isolation that often accompany difficult experiences, enabling individuals to gain a sense of relief and comfort.

2. Developing Coping Strategies : Therapy equips individuals with the necessary tools to cope with challenging circumstances effectively. Skilled therapists employ various evidence-based techniques and strategies tailored to the unique needs of each client. They may help individuals identify negative patterns of thinking, challenge irrational beliefs, and develop healthier coping mechanisms. Through therapy, individuals can learn to manage stress, regulate their emotions, and cultivate resilience. These coping strategies not only assist during difficult times but also serve as lifelong skills, empowering individuals to navigate future challenges with greater ease and confidence.

3. Gaining Self-awareness and Insight: Hard times often bring about a sense of confusion and self-doubt. Therapy offers an opportunity for self-exploration and introspection, allowing individuals to gain a deeper understanding of themselves and their reactions to adversity. By examining their thoughts, emotions, and behavioral patterns within the therapeutic setting, individuals can uncover underlying issues, unresolved trauma, or limiting beliefs that may contribute to their distress. This process of self-awareness and insight provides a solid foundation for personal growth and healing. With the guidance of a therapist, individuals can learn to reframe their experiences, develop healthier perspectives, and make positive changes in their lives.

Conclusion: When faced with hard times, seeking therapy can be a transformative step towards healing and personal growth. Therapy offers a supportive and professional relationship that helps individuals validate their emotions, develop effective coping strategies, and gain self-awareness. By utilizing therapy as a resource during challenging periods, individuals can find solace, strength, and the necessary tools to navigate through difficult circumstances. Remember, reaching out for help is a sign of courage and resilience, and it can lead to a brighter future filled with renewed hope and well-being.

Embrace the Summer Glow: How Counseling Can Help You Thrive Even When Things Are Going Well

Summer is a season of joy, growth, and abundance. It's a time when we feel inspired by the beauty of the world around us and find ourselves basking in the warmth of positivity. While counseling is often associated with times of struggle, it can be incredibly beneficial to embark on this journey even when things are going well. In this blog, we will explore the reasons why starting counseling in the summer, during a period of personal prosperity, can help you maintain and enhance your overall well-being.

1. Proactive Self-Care: When everything seems to be going smoothly, it's easy to overlook our emotional well-being. However, starting counseling during a time of personal prosperity allows you to prioritize proactive self-care. By seeking therapy when you're already in a positive state, you can work with a therapist to develop strategies to maintain your well-being and prevent future challenges from derailing your progress.

2. Building Resilience: Counseling is not just about overcoming difficulties; it's also about building resilience and personal growth. During a period of success, counseling can provide a safe space to explore your strengths, values, and aspirations. A therapist can help you identify any areas for further growth, enhance your coping skills, and develop strategies to navigate future obstacles effectively.

3. Deepening Self-Awareness: When things are going well, it can be an opportune time to dive deeper into self-reflection. Counseling offers a unique space to gain insight into your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, even when they're positive. By exploring the root causes of your success and understanding the patterns that contribute to your well-being, you can cultivate a stronger sense of self-awareness and make conscious choices to maintain and nurture your positive state.

4. Enhancing Relationships: Healthy relationships are a cornerstone of personal fulfillment. Engaging in counseling during a time of personal prosperity can help you further strengthen your existing relationships and develop new ones. A therapist can guide you in navigating communication, setting boundaries, and addressing any underlying issues that may arise, ultimately enhancing your connection with others.

5. Future-Proofing Your Well-Being: By starting counseling when things are going well, you can future-proof your well-being. Therapy can equip you with valuable tools, coping mechanisms, and strategies to navigate future challenges effectively. The insights gained during counseling can serve as a strong foundation for personal growth, allowing you to maintain your positive state and handle any obstacles that may come your way.

Conclusion: While counseling is often associated with challenging times, embarking on this journey during a period of personal prosperity can be just as transformative. By engaging in therapy when things are going well, you prioritize proactive self-care, build resilience, deepen self-awareness, enhance relationships, and future-proof your well-being. So, as the summer sun shines brightly, take this opportunity to invest in your emotional health and ensure that you continue to thrive and grow, even when life is at its best.

Why Therapy Might be the Right Choice for You

Life is a beautiful yet complex tapestry, woven with a myriad of experiences, emotions, and challenges. Sometimes, navigating through the intricacies of our own minds can be overwhelming. It is during these times that counseling can be a transformative and empowering resource. In this blog post, we will delve into the compelling reasons why you should consider embarking on a counseling journey and discover the profound benefits it can bring to your life.

1. Gaining Clarity and Self-Awareness:

Counseling provides a safe and non-judgmental space for introspection and self-reflection. It allows you to explore your thoughts, emotions, and experiences in a supportive environment. Through therapeutic conversations, you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself, your patterns of behavior, and the underlying beliefs that shape your worldview. This increased self-awareness can lead to clarity, helping you make informed decisions and fostering personal growth.

2. Developing Coping Strategies:

Life presents us with a multitude of challenges, both big and small. Counseling equips you with effective coping strategies to navigate these challenges with resilience and grace. A skilled counselor can guide you in developing healthy coping mechanisms, enhancing your ability to manage stress, anxiety, and other emotional difficulties. These tools become invaluable assets that you can carry with you throughout your life's journey.

3. Healing Past Wounds:

Unresolved past experiences and traumas can continue to affect our emotional well-being long after they have occurred. Counseling provides a nurturing space for healing and processing these wounds. A counselor can help you work through the pain, unravel the layers of emotions associated with past events, and support you in the journey towards forgiveness, acceptance, and inner peace. Healing from the past frees you to embrace the present and create a brighter future.

4. Improving Relationships:

Our connections with others profoundly impact our overall well-being and happiness. Counseling can significantly enhance your relationships by improving communication, fostering empathy, and developing healthier boundaries. Through counseling, you can gain insight into relational patterns, address conflicts, and learn effective strategies for building and maintaining meaningful connections. Stronger and more fulfilling relationships await on the other side of counseling.

5. Enhancing Mental Health and Well-being:

Prioritizing your mental health is crucial for overall well-being. Counseling offers a proactive approach to mental health maintenance. It provides you with a dedicated space to express your feelings, reduce emotional distress, and prevent potential issues from escalating. Just as we go to the gym to exercise our bodies, counseling exercises and strengthens our minds, enabling us to thrive in all areas of life.

Conclusion:

Choosing to start counseling is an act of self-care, self-discovery, and self-empowerment. It is an investment in your overall well-being and personal growth. By embarking on this transformative journey, you open doors to increased self-awareness, healing, resilience, and enhanced relationships. Whether you are seeking clarity in life's complexities, healing from past wounds, developing coping strategies, or simply nurturing your mental health, counseling can be the catalyst that unlocks your true potential. Take that courageous step today and embark on a counseling journey to unleash the power within you. Remember, you deserve to live a fulfilling and joyful life, and counseling can guide you on that path.

The Healing Power of Using Your Voice: Cultivating Relationships and Connection

On Christians Seeking Therapy

1. Honest Communication and Emotional Expression: Using our voices authentically and honestly is essential for building strong and healthy relationships. Open communication allows us to express our emotions, needs, and desires, creating a foundation of trust and understanding. When we speak from the heart and share our vulnerabilities, we invite others to do the same, fostering an environment of empathy and compassion. By using our voices to communicate effectively, we can heal wounds, resolve conflicts, and strengthen the bonds we share with others.

2. Active Listening and Empathy: True connection and healing in relationships require more than just speaking; it also demands active listening. When we lend our ears and truly listen to others, we demonstrate empathy and validate their experiences. By acknowledging their feelings and perspectives without judgment, we create a space where healing can occur. Listening with empathy not only helps heal the other person but also deepens our own understanding and strengthens the connection we share.

3. Expressing Forgiveness and Seeking Reconciliation: Using our voices to express forgiveness can be a transformative act. When we communicate our forgiveness to those who have hurt us, we release ourselves from the burden of resentment and open the door to healing. Additionally, seeking reconciliation through open and honest conversations can mend broken relationships and foster understanding. By using our voices to extend forgiveness and work towards reconciliation, we create opportunities for growth, trust, and deeper connections.

4. Sharing Stories and Cultivating Empathy: Stories have a unique way of connecting people on a deep level. By using our voices to share our stories, we invite others into our world, fostering empathy and understanding. When we share our triumphs, struggles, and vulnerabilities, we create an environment where others can relate and find solace. By using our voices to share stories of healing and resilience, we inspire and uplift others who may be on their own journey of healing.

5. Cultivating Emotional Support Networks: Using our voices to reach out for support is crucial for healing and fostering connection. When we vocalize our struggles, we invite others to offer their compassion and support. By communicating our needs and seeking help, we build a network of emotional support that can aid us in our healing process. Using our voices to reach out and create these support networks helps us realize that we are not alone in our challenges and that healing is possible through the power of connection.

Using our voices as a tool for healing, connection, and nurturing relationships is a profound gift we possess. By communicating honestly, listening empathetically, forgiving, sharing stories, and seeking support, we can foster deep connections and contribute to our own healing and the healing of others. Let us recognize the transformative power of our voices and embrace them as instruments of healing, love, and connection in our lives.

On Christians Seeking Therapy

As Christians, we believe that God is the ultimate healer, and that He has the power to restore us to wholeness in body, mind, and spirit. However, we also know that God often works through people and resources to bring about healing and transformation in our lives. This includes seeking therapy, which can be an important tool for Christians to deepen their faith, improve their mental health, and strengthen their relationships.

Here are some of the benefits of Christians seeking therapy, as supported by the Bible:

1. Improved Mental Health: The Bible tells us to take care of our bodies and minds, as they are temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Seeking therapy can help us honor this commandment by improving our mental health and well-being. The psalmist writes, "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds" (Psalm 147:3), indicating that God cares about our emotional health and wants us to seek help when we are hurting.

2. Strengthened Relationships: The Bible emphasizes the importance of healthy relationships and community. Proverbs 27:17 says, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Seeking therapy can help us improve our communication skills, resolve conflicts, and develop deeper connections with those around us. This, in turn, can help us fulfill the commandment to love one another (John 13:34-35) and build up the body of Christ (Ephesians 4:12-16).

3. Deepened Spiritual Connection: Seeking therapy can also help us deepen our spiritual connection with God. The Bible tells us to seek wisdom and understanding, as they are more valuable than gold (Proverbs 16:16). By exploring our faith and beliefs with a therapist, we can gain new insights and perspectives on our spiritual journey. In doing so, we can draw closer to God and experience His grace and mercy in new and transformative ways.

4. Increased Self-Awareness: The Bible encourages us to examine our hearts and motives, so that we can become more like Christ. Psalm 139:23-24 says, "Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Seeking therapy can help us become more self-aware and identify areas of our lives that may need healing and transformation. By working through these issues with a therapist, we can become more whole and more aligned with God's will for our lives.

5. Overcoming Stigma: The Bible reminds us to show compassion and care for those who are hurting or in need. Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Seeking therapy can help us overcome the stigma and shame that can sometimes be associated with mental health issues. By being open and honest about our struggles, we can create a safe and supportive environment for others to do the same. In doing so, we can fulfill our calling to love and care for one another as Christ did.

In conclusion, seeking therapy can provide numerous benefits for Christians, including improved mental health, strengthened relationships, deepened spiritual connection, increased self-awareness, and overcoming stigma. By prioritizing our mental health and seeking treatment when necessary, we can honor God's commandment to care for our bodies and minds, while also deepening our faith and our relationships with others.

Finding Yourself Through Therapy: A Guide for Women

Therapy is a powerful tool that can help women find themselves and reclaim their power. It's a safe space where they can explore their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a non-judgmental environment. If you're a woman struggling with issues related to your identity, self-esteem, relationships, or any other area of your life, therapy can provide the support and guidance you need to overcome your challenges.

Why Women Need Therapy

Women face a unique set of challenges in their lives that can impact their mental health and wellbeing. The societal pressures to conform to unrealistic beauty standards, the expectations of being a perfect wife, mother, and employee, the lack of representation and opportunities in male-dominated industries are just a few of the issues that can weigh heavily on women's minds.

Additionally, women often experience trauma, abuse, or discrimination, which can lead to anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, or other mental health conditions. Unfortunately, women can be more likely to internalize their emotions and suffer in silence, which can exacerbate their symptoms and delay their healing process.

That's why therapy is crucial for women to address their mental health concerns, find their voice, and build resilience. Therapy offers a safe space for women to talk about their experiences, emotions, and thoughts, without fear of judgment or shame. It provides women with the tools to manage their stress, regulate their emotions, and improve their relationships with themselves and others.

How Therapy Can Help You Find Yourself

Finding oneself is a journey of self-discovery and self-awareness. It involves exploring your values, beliefs, passions, and purpose in life, and aligning them with your actions and goals. However, many women struggle with finding themselves, as they often prioritize other people's needs over their own and lose touch with their identity and desires.

Therapy can help you find yourself by:

1. Identifying your patterns and limiting beliefs: In therapy, you can explore the underlying patterns and beliefs that hold you back from being your true self. You can learn to challenge negative self-talk, replace self-criticism with self-compassion, and develop a growth mindset.

2. Exploring your values and passions: Therapy can help you clarify your values and passions and align them with your goals and actions. You can explore your strengths and weaknesses, interests and hobbies, and discover new opportunities for personal and professional growth.

3. Building healthy relationships: Therapy can help you improve your communication skills, set boundaries, and cultivate meaningful relationships that support your growth and wellbeing. You can learn to recognize toxic relationships and let go of them, and surround yourself with people who uplift and inspire you.

4. Practicing self-care: Therapy can teach you self-care practices that promote your physical, emotional, and mental health. You can learn to prioritize your needs, manage your stress, and cultivate a healthy lifestyle that enhances your self-esteem and confidence.

Final Thoughts

Finding oneself is not a destination but a journey that requires courage, patience, and self-compassion. Therapy can be a valuable tool to support you on your journey and help you overcome your obstacles. Whether you're struggling with anxiety, depression, trauma, or any other mental health concern, therapy can provide you with the support, guidance, and tools you need to find yourself and live your best life.

Benefits of Therapy For Anxiety

Anxiety is a common mental health issue that affects millions of people around the world. It can cause intense feelings of worry, fear, and panic, and can have a significant impact on a person's quality of life. However, therapy can be an effective treatment option for anxiety, providing numerous benefits for those who seek it out.

Here are some of the benefits of therapy for anxiety:

1. Developing Coping Mechanisms

One of the most significant benefits of therapy for anxiety is that it can help individuals develop coping mechanisms. Through therapy, individuals can learn various coping strategies and techniques to manage their anxiety effectively. These strategies can include deep breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and other mindfulness-based techniques. By learning and practicing these strategies, individuals can better cope with their anxiety symptoms when they arise.

2. Identifying Triggers

Another benefit of therapy for anxiety is that it can help individuals identify their triggers. Triggers are situations, events, or even people that can cause anxiety symptoms to flare up. By identifying these triggers, individuals can take steps to avoid or manage them better. A therapist can work with individuals to help them identify their triggers and develop strategies for dealing with them.

3. Improving Communication Skills

Many people with anxiety struggle with communication, whether it's due to social anxiety or other anxiety-related issues. Therapy can help individuals improve their communication skills, which can help them in various aspects of their lives. By learning how to communicate more effectively, individuals can reduce the stress and anxiety associated with social situations and relationships.

4. Improving Self-Esteem

Anxiety can often lead to low self-esteem, as individuals may feel that they are not good enough or that they are constantly failing. Therapy can help individuals improve their self-esteem by teaching them how to challenge negative thoughts and beliefs about themselves. By learning to recognize and challenge negative self-talk, individuals can develop a more positive self-image and improve their overall mental health.

5. Providing a Safe Space to Express Emotions

Therapy provides a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to express their emotions. Anxiety can be overwhelming and isolating, and talking about it with a therapist can help individuals feel heard and understood. This can help to reduce feelings of loneliness and increase feelings of connection and support.

6. Providing Support and Encouragement

Finally, therapy can provide individuals with the support and encouragement they need to manage their anxiety effectively. A therapist can help individuals set achievable goals and work toward them, providing guidance and motivation along the way. This can be incredibly beneficial for individuals who may feel overwhelmed or discouraged by their anxiety symptoms.

In conclusion, therapy can be an effective treatment option for anxiety, providing individuals with numerous benefits. Whether you are struggling with social anxiety, panic disorder, or another type of anxiety disorder, therapy can help you develop coping mechanisms, identify triggers, improve communication skills, boost self-esteem, provide a safe space to express emotions, and provide support and encouragement. If you are experiencing anxiety symptoms, consider seeking out therapy to help you manage your symptoms and improve your overall mental health.

Benefits of Therapy for Women

Women often have unique experiences and challenges in life that can cause stress, anxiety, and other mental health issues. Seeking therapy can be a beneficial way for women to cope with these challenges and improve their overall well-being.

Therapy provides a safe and confidential space for women to discuss their thoughts, feelings, and experiences with a trained mental health professional. This can be especially important for women who may not have a supportive network of friends or family members to talk to.

Some of the benefits of seeking therapy for women include:

1. Improved mental health: Therapy can help women manage symptoms of depression, anxiety, and other mental health conditions. By providing coping strategies and tools for managing difficult emotions, therapy can help women improve their overall mental health and well-being.

2. Increased self-awareness: Through therapy, women can gain a better understanding of their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. This increased self-awareness can help women make positive changes in their lives and relationships.

3. Better communication skills: Many women struggle with communication issues in their personal and professional lives. Therapy can help women develop better communication skills, which can lead to improved relationships and greater success in the workplace.

4. Improved relationships: Whether it's with a romantic partner, family member, or friend, therapy can help women improve their relationships by providing tools for healthy communication, conflict resolution, and boundary-setting.

5. Reduced stress: Women may experience stress related to a variety of factors, including work, family, and social expectations. Therapy can provide strategies for managing stress and promoting relaxation, leading to better overall health and well-being.

It's important to note that seeking therapy does not mean that there is something "wrong" with a woman. Everyone faces challenges in life, and seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Therapy can provide a valuable resource for women looking to improve their mental health and well-being.

If you are a woman who is considering therapy, it's important to find a therapist who understands your unique experiences and challenges. Look for a therapist who has experience working with women and who you feel comfortable talking to. With the right therapist, therapy can be a powerful tool for improving your life and well-being.

Encanto and Family Relationships

Disney’s Encanto has been one of my favorite movies and this blog will be filled with some spoilers. Besides all of the fun songs (“We don’t talk about Bruno” is playing in my head 90% of the time and I don’t mind), Encanto really speaks on family relationships and generational trauma. It might be something you miss the first time around, but have you noticed that there is no villain in this movie? The lack of a villain is due to the internal struggles of the family dynamics and the family seeking to resolve it.

Going back to family relationships, the characters are so relatable. If you watch this movie and think about this family, you can see yourself as one (if not more) of the characters. Here are some examples of the characters and the role they play in the family:

Bruno- The black sheep. The one the family blames the problems on. He actually runs away to protect the family and is actively working to repair the family while he is away.

Luisa- The strong one. Continually takes on the family burdens and pressures, keeps all her emotions inside. Never lets herself rest or relax to take care of the family.

Mirabel- The scapegoat. She is constantly fighting to prove her worth and help save her family all the while being blamed for the family’s problems. She cares deeply for her family and is waiting to be soon for who she is.

Isabella- The perfectionist. She works so hard to execute everything perfectly, from her flowers to her picture poses. She doesn’t feel permission to make mistakes and sacrifices her needs to help the family.

Pepa- The emotional one. You are able to see her every emotion. People are constantly triggering her mood swings and at the same time others are upset when her mood affects the weather negatively.  

Abuela- The matriarch. She experienced incredible hardship and trauma, being forced from her home and the death of her spouse while caring for 3 young babies. She feels unworthy of her gift “the miracle” and pushes her entire family to be good enough for it. People seem to walk on eggshells around her. Abuela’s intentions are good but harmful.

 
Which one do you identify with? Remember, one of the characters are bad or villains. Being able to identify the character you relate to can help you gain so much perspective on your situation. It also can help you to gain some ideas on how to alleviate some of the negatives of your situation. For example, Isabella learned that it’s ok to not be perfect all the time and Luisa learned to share her struggles with others. Notice that there was a lot of vulnerability that had to happen and a shift within the family to begin changing. Once Mirabel decided to change and go outside of the accepted family norms, it lead to others changing as well. Mirabel was the catalyst for her family.

If you haven’t watched this yet, I encourage you to go and watch it (a few times if you have to). Look at the different characters and see who you find yourself relating the most to. What roles do you and other family members take on? How can you step outside of this role? If you are feeling like it’s impossible to step outside of your role, talk to a friend or share it with your therapist. Changing the norms is hard, but not impossible. You are capable of achieving the relationships you want with those around you.

I do not speak for the Disney brand or company. Disney’s Encanto is available to watch on Disney+.

Top 5 Christmas Gifts for Those you Love with Anxiety

If someone you love struggles with anxiety, these might be beneficial for them! (Remember to get them other gifts too). If you are the one struggling with anxiety feel free to treat yourself too! It is ok to prioritize your mental health and well-being. Here are some gift ideas that might help!

1.       Fidgets

Fidgets are great for those who struggle with anxiety, It can include fidget rings, spinners, cubes, monkey noodles, slime, pop-its etc. If you are buying for a child, be aware that some schools may not allow you to bring these items to school. One of my personal favorite fidgets is the cute octopus that is a fidget spinner, pop-it, and has feelings faces all in one.

While you may just think fidgets are just for kids, think again! Many adults I know have their own fidgets. They keep them accessible on their desk, car or in their home. Fidgets offer a calming effect. While they don’t “cure” anxiety, they can help bring some relief. It gives you a sense of control, it can keep your hands and mind busy which can in turn move your focus away from the anxiety fight, flight, freeze response and to a more rational state. And my goodness, who wouldn’t love to have this cute octopus as a desk toy!?

Target Fidget Spinner Octopus

2.       Weighted Blanket

Weighted blankets are amazing! I received one myself as a gift for Christmas one year and honestly, I wasn’t convinced it would help. Alas, I was wrong. The weighted blanket felt so calming and soothing. The one I had received (from Target) was also cooling. On particularly anxious nights when my mind is running and I have a hard time relaxing, I pull out my weighted blanket and I’m out like a dream.

When you are purchasing a weighted blanket pay attention to the weight of the person you are buying for. The weight of the person determines the weight needed for the blanket. There is a chart that helps you to determine the weight of the blanket, many recommend it needs to be 10% of the body weight. For children under 5 and those with medical concerns, consult with your doctor before using a weighted blanket.

Check out this page for more information on finding the right weight for your blanket:

Casper- How heavy should a weighted blanket be?

We call weighted blankets in our home “anxious blankets,” but they can also be used to help those who experience ADHD, PTSD, insomnia, autism and depression. It isn’t something you necessarily have to use every single night. If you find yourself struggling with anxiety and unable to sleep, this could be very beneficial.

This one from Target is a cooling weighted blanket. Target also has several different kid friendly weighted blanket designs and colors on their website. You can find weighted blankets at most major retail stores.

Target Cooling Weighted Blanket

 3.       Kinetic Sand

Kinetic Sand is my favorite! It is also one of the most used items in my office for those who struggle with anxiety. Many of my younger clients love the scented kinetic sands, I personally prefer the original one. I also love that kinetic sand feels awesome and is a less messy version of regular sand. This is great to keep in a Tupperware container on the countertop and have it accessible for when you need it. Open up the container and you can play with it while you are making a hard phone call, doing your work, or even if you are simply anticipating a future event.

Kinetic sand is great for sensory regulation. It can relieve some of the tension that you are feeling in your body. It is also easy to physically manipulate, meaning that when you squeeze it in your hands, you can form it and shape it how you want and then slowly let it fall from your hands. It can help those with anxiety to feel a sense of control.

You can find kinetic sand at most major retail stores. This one is from Amazon.

Amazon Kinetic Sand Beach Kingdom Playset

4.      Scripture Anxiety and Panic Relief Pocket Booklet to Take on the Go.

I found this listing on Etsy and I think this would be a great tool for those with anxiety. Often times when people are feeling anxious the immediate thoughts are on the anxiety provoking event. When the anxiety rises and panic increases, rational thought starts to go out the window. Remembering your coping skills can be so difficult when those anxious thoughts are increasing. Having this on hand, helps make it so that you don’t have to remember every single thing. You can just remember to look at your flip booklet and it will guide you through it so you can immediately regulate. It has one of my favorite grounding techniques for anxiety 5-4-3-2-1 and also includes crisis lines in case you need it.

Etsy Scripture Anxiety and Panic Relief Pocket Booklet to Take on the Go

5.       Anti-Anxiety Notebook

This notebook was created by therapists for those struggling with anxiety. It uses cognitive behavioral therapy to help you tackle that anxiety.

It includes “guided journal entries, structured exercises, regular check-ins and more than 100 notes and tips from therapists encourage you to become aware of your thoughts and emotions, and ultimately help you to reframe, challenge, and change these when needed.”

This notebook will help you to process the anxiety and origins. It can also help walk you through what happened and other potential thoughts you could have instead of the anxious thoughts. This would be great for those already in therapy as an additional support throughout the week. It would also be beneficial for those who are not yet in therapy to begin to understand where those thoughts come from.

Anti Anxiety Notebook

Connected Families Counseling nor any of its employees are paid or sponsored by products in this post and will not receive any compensation for this post.

5 Signs Your Child May Need Counseling for Anxiety

People are aware their child struggles with anxiety and they are working on making changes to reduce the anxiety in the home. It is difficult to know as a parent the degree at which your child is struggling. Parents will ask at what point should my child be in therapy? It is a great question that I get asked often.

If you are seeing cause for concern in your child, it is a great idea to seek therapy. This could mean having your child in counseling by themselves, or as the parent(s) going to counseling to learn strategies to reduce the anxiety in the home. Often, when a child has anxiety there is a parent who also struggles with anxiety. Having the parents receive help for their anxiety in turn can help the children find relief as well.

The following are things to look out for when considering if you need extra help for your child to manage their anxiety. Pay attention to how often and when your child displays these symptoms of anxiety. Children struggling with anxiety may exhibit one or more of these symptoms. The most important one being that it is having an effect on their daily life and functioning.

Signs your child may need counseling for anxiety:

1.       Anxiety is affecting daily functioning

When anxiety starts to interfere with daily life or enjoyable parts of life for your child, this is your biggest sign to get counseling. Most people have anxiety and can continue living their lives. Anxiety that has continued to grow will begin to seep into the regular parts of life. This leads to school being a struggle, they may want to drop out of activities, they won’t want to do things that used to be fun. Withdrawing from activities they no longer enjoy is different than withdrawing from activities that cause anxiety. Stopping the activity may help for the immediate relief of anxiety, however, undealt with anxiety will continue to grow. Working through the anxiety, will help your child to process it, develop strategies to manage it, begin to resume functioning in their daily life and ultimately begin to seek out the things they enjoy.  

2.       Frequent headaches or stomachaches

If your child is suffering from frequent headaches or stomachaches, that have no other medical explanation, it is most likely anxiety. When you get headaches and stomachaches, it is your body telling you that something is wrong. Often, children don’t know what anxiety is or how to process it and it shows up as their head/stomach hurting. Anxiety that has been avoided or left unprocessed will continue to build. The headaches and stomachaches are your body telling you that something must be done with your emotions. Pay attention to when this happens for your child, if it is at a certain time of a day, around a certain group of people, during a certain event.

3.       Frequent crying

When a child is unable to process their anxiety, it can lead to frequent crying or meltdowns. The anxiety that has been built up can stress the child out so much that it leads to crying. With anxiety, children feel a sense of constant danger or threats, endless nervousness or worry. Having these thoughts consistently in your mind can be exhausting. Crying can sometimes be a release of those built-up emotions.  Frequent crying that is more than what is developmentally normal for your child’s age could be from anxiety that is overwhelming to your child.

4.       Trouble sleeping

This will often look like restless sleep. Your child will toss and turn all night. In the mornings, your child is likely to be cranky. Typically, children can push down the anxious thoughts throughout the day with everything they have going on. At nighttime, everything is still, and all the anxieties come up and take over. When your child is having trouble sleeping, it will begin affecting their daily functioning. Sleep is incredibly important for your health, and when anxiety begins to disrupt sleep, it can create problems for all aspects of health.

5.       Need for constant reassurance

This looks like your child constantly asking for reassurance. Some children’s love language is “affirmations” and they will want this reassurance a lot. Some parents don’t give their child “good job,” “way to go,” or “I love you” that often (or it takes the child reminding them to do it). This is not what I am talking about. This is the child’s constant need to be reassured with what they are doing, how they are doing it, etc. They might ask multiple times for reassurance over the same thing. Even when you give them the affirmation they are asking for, they will likely continue to second guess themselves.

A note on this: giving children affirmations and reassurance is a good thing. If your child is continually looking for reassurance, it is because they need it. When your child asks for the same reassurance multiple times in a row, try to identify the need that your child is asking to be met. Are they needing safety, security, nurture, guidance, structure? When you can identify the need, it gives you guidelines for how to respond. Constant reassurance can also be met with, “(child) let’s take some time and sit together and do some deep breaths.” Modeling the coping skill such as deep breathing and doing this with your child can help your child regulate and calm the anxiety.

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For children up to age 14, I highly recommend they seek a therapist who has play therapy training. Someone with this training will have interventions to help your child develop coping skills, process their anxiety, and develop strategies to find anxiety relief. Older teens and adults can process through talking. With play therapy interventions, children are able to process their anxiety in the way they know best, by playing!  

It can be scary to seek out counseling for your child and it can be scary to see your child struggling. When you make the choice to get therapy for your child, you are showing your love for your child by getting them the help they need. It is not a failure to need outside help, rather it is a sign of strength that you are giving your child the resources they need to thrive.

Why are my Anxiety Symptoms Increasing?

It can be so frustrating for those struggling with anxiety to continue getting more anxious. You are so aware of what is going on around you and you are taking so many steps to prevent yourself from becoming more anxious but it doesn’t seem to help. Ugh!

One of the first things I check with clients is making sure there haven’t been any medication or supplement changes. Always check your medications and make sure the side effects don’t include anxiety. There are even anxiety medications with a symptom of anxiety. Sounds crazy, right? If there have been medication changes and your anxiety symptoms are getting worse, talk to your doctor. There may be other options if it’s affecting you.

We would also look at major dietary changes, exercise and sleeping habits. How we treat our bodies affects our bodies. These things play huge roles in our thoughts, emotions and behaviors. While starting new habits are good for diet and exercise, I would recommend slowly incorporating new healthy changes in order to help your body adjust (as always, follow the advice of your doctor). If you are not sleeping consistently or enough, try to focus on getting your 8 hours every night. You can find more info on my post here.

If there haven’t been any recent medication changes, we are going to look for any recent triggers. Has something major happened it could be as significant as a trauma, something that reminded you of a trauma you’ve experienced? Is there an upcoming event or situation that will happen or recently happened? What changes have gone on in the world around you?

As we are looking into all these questions, lightbulbs might start coming on and you will realize “Oh, so that is why my anxiety is increasing!”

But, what if things have stayed the same and it is still getting worse, what does that mean?

Are you in an environment that continuously contributes to your anxiety? As you are continuously in a situation that is adding to your anxiety (even if the environment isn’t changing), you will begin to grow tired. This will lend to your thought processes being unable to handle the anxiety with as much stamina as you used to. You may be sleeping well, but the never-ending anxiety through the days can be exhausting.

One of the biggest contributors to anxiety increasing that I have seen, is failure to deal with the anxiety. Yikes! That’s a punch to the gut. When you continuously avoid, ignore or just push down the anxiety and pretend like everything is fine it doesn’t actually get rid of the anxiety. You are just really great at sweeping things under the rug. Let’s think about what happens when things get swept under the rug. It is fine for a while and you can go about your days just fine. But over time, it gets piled up and gets to a point where you can’t ignore it anymore.

Talking about your anxiety, facing the hard truth about it can do wonders for your anxiety. This doesn’t mean you need to scream to the world you have anxiety. This just means, talk to someone. Find a trusted friend or family member, seek out counseling, talk to your doctor, start journaling your feelings and rating your anxiety. Being aware of your anxiety can do wonders. Talking to someone about your anxiety can help reduce shame, share the burden and feel connected in your struggle.